first

Upon beginning Junior High School in 1993 I still looked like a little kid, and I really wanted to be a cheerleader. Even though I loved Radiohead and flannels, I thought the Taft Tigers were the Shit. “A double u E s.o.m.e, awesome awesome, totally!” I honestly believed. My mom helped me work on my jumps and cheers, and I had a really good tryout for the squad. Round-off into a split? High ponytail? I had it all and mega fucking spirit to boot. I found out on the day of Richard Nixon’s funeral that I didn’t make it. I wished to be an outcast, a martyr with an STP shirt and a marijuana cigarette, but I never had a cause. The day Richard Nixon got buried in the ground was the day I discovered mediocrity. For some, mediocrity signals a will to prove, but for me, it was a beacon. They say Nixon was the president that caused an entire generation to lose hope in government. It was raining so hard that day. I was clinically depressed for the next ten years.